The other day I was in a store getting groceries. I was holding Daisy, as usual, and a grandma-ish, old lady comes up to me.
“Aw, what a cute baby. Are you her babysitter?”
” Thank you. No, she’s my daughter.”
Uh. She’s old, so I just bite my tongue and politely ignore her and keep looking at chips or whatever it was I was looking at.
“Wow, you’re so young!”
Uhh… Wow, you’re so old!! Still I don’t say anything.
“Well, you two can grow up together.”
And she walked off. HOLY CRAP!?!?! Ok?? At that, I laughed and said to Daisy, “C’mon Daisy, let’s go ‘grow up together’!” Pretty loudly.
I mean, seriously, I know she was old and to her a 50-year-old probably looked 12, but what makes people think they have the right to just walk up and say whatever they want?
Honestly, I was kind of expecting it when I was pregnant. I’m almost 22 years old but I realize, that sometimes, when I don’t dress up and am just in a t-shirt and jeans, I look 16. I was expecting the judgemental looks and comments, but not as much while I have Daisy.
Really, it’s been my curse to carry for a while. You know people talked while Ryan and I were dating. I heard it from everyone when we got engaged and married. Even still petty people like to bring up my age in arguments that have nothing to do with the fact.
Age doesn’t equal maturity. I know 35-year-old women who still talk and gossip like they were in highschool. I know 50-year-old women who thrive on drama. The other day I saw a, probably around 40-year-old, mother, carrying her NEWBORN in the cold, with nothing but a onesie on. Just a onesie. Daisy was wearing, jeans, a long-sleeved shirt, a coat and a hat. This was a 40-year-old, with a newborn who was wearing next to nothing. Where was that old, rude, grandmother then?
I take care of myself, I take care of my child and my husband. We’ve been married for two years and are still very much in love. So why does my age matter to anyone else?
What if I want to be the hot PTA mom? What if I want to be the youngest mom taking her daughter to kindergaten? What if I want to be done having kids by the time I’m thirty so I can still have my body AND my family? What if I want to still be young enough to have plenty of energy to chase my babies around without resenting them?
I know 35-40 year olds who act like they hate their kids. “OHH TWO MORE YEARS UNTIL THEIR IN SCHOOL, THANK GOD!!!” “OH ONE HOUR UNTIL NAP TIME UGHHH” “WHEN IS BEDTIME UHHHH” I absolutely love every moment with my daughter. We play, we laugh, we talk and have a wonderful time. I MISS her during nap time and like it when she stays up late with me. The thought of sending her away to school kills me already.
I would never think of walking up to an older mother and saying “Wow, you’re so old to have such a young baby… Do you have life insurance?… How do you have the energy to keep up?…Wow, you’re going to be so old when she’s 18..”
It’s no one elses’ business how old I am. I’m young, I’m married, I’m a mom, I’m a woman, I chose this life, I love this life and nothing else matters to me.
You & Me 